Philosophy: 0 - Coffee: 1
Aug. 9th, 2004 11:52 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
xaaraNew volunteer in the office today. He's a philosophy major, relatively easy on the eyes, very serious, and rather quiet. His conversational skills are comparable to those of paint drying on a very intelligent wall. Why, I ask you, why do they always give me the boring ones? *pouts* I want Ali back.
Oh, I met this Icelandic guy who runs both the CAT scanning lab and the 6th floor coffee machine today. I don't know how good he is at the CAT scanning business, but damn he can brew one strong cup of coffee. It's settled. I'm marrying a guy from Iceland. I'm even willing to compromise on the "Must be Able to Barbeque" bullet of the Requirements to Marry Carmen checklist if he can fully fulfill the "Must be Able to Brew Stomach-Eroding Coffee" bullet.
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Cause and Effect Rules for Sidewalk Travel
Xander
1. When walking with women, allow five (5) feet of clearance on all sides or be prepared to deal with messy aftermath.
2. When averting apocalypses, avoid sidewalks as they are likely to disappear into gaping chasms.
3. When taking Anya out, apply rule #1 or risk the outcome of rule #2.
4. Do not approach (a) humans with abnormal pets, (b) humanish creatures with abnormal body characteristics, (c) anything that is out in Sunnydale in the middle of the night, or (d) blonde vampires. Close proximity to above generally results in pain, unconsciousness, or eye-rolling.
4. When possible, drive.
Oh, I met this Icelandic guy who runs both the CAT scanning lab and the 6th floor coffee machine today. I don't know how good he is at the CAT scanning business, but damn he can brew one strong cup of coffee. It's settled. I'm marrying a guy from Iceland. I'm even willing to compromise on the "Must be Able to Barbeque" bullet of the Requirements to Marry Carmen checklist if he can fully fulfill the "Must be Able to Brew Stomach-Eroding Coffee" bullet.
<<<<>>>><<<<>>>><<<<>>>><<<<>>>>
Cause and Effect Rules for Sidewalk Travel
Xander
1. When walking with women, allow five (5) feet of clearance on all sides or be prepared to deal with messy aftermath.
2. When averting apocalypses, avoid sidewalks as they are likely to disappear into gaping chasms.
3. When taking Anya out, apply rule #1 or risk the outcome of rule #2.
4. Do not approach (a) humans with abnormal pets, (b) humanish creatures with abnormal body characteristics, (c) anything that is out in Sunnydale in the middle of the night, or (d) blonde vampires. Close proximity to above generally results in pain, unconsciousness, or eye-rolling.
4. When possible, drive.
